Monday, June 2, 2008

Remember the Pinewood Derby post?

The following day Lacey Grace was playing at a friend's house and Lincoln took a long nap and I wrote about that experience in the form of a story and submitted it to The Friend magazine. Immediately I got an e-mail back asking if the story was true and I responded that very day. A month passed and I heard nothing. I hate checking my E-Mail but I checked it so often that Jay asked me if I was addicted to the computer. I know that none of you think it would be exciting to have something published in The Friend but to me it represents so much more. I want to write and don't have any idea how to do it or where to start and so this tiny effort represents the courage I have been trying to build for so long to try and keep trying in the face of lots of rejection.

I have submitted two articles in the past to other magazines. One to Family Fun Magazine and one to the Ensign. The Ensign wrote back to say that it would be about eight weeks before they made a decision. That was two years ago; haven't heard a word. Family Fun magazine was mute. Each time this happens it takes about a year for me to have the guts to try again. I have heard that most writers get about one hundred rejections before they ever get anything published and those are the lucky ones. Well, in three years I've only submitted three articles and I'm 39. At this rate things aren't looking very promising. And I don't know if I can even count those first two as rejections because I didn't receive even so much as an "Um, thanks anyway," or "You must be insane!" It's all very disheartening.

To make matters worse I recently sent JeNeale my favorite book and I inscribed it in pen. Reading back over it I noted that I had not only mispunctuated but had also used poor grammar which wouldn't be so mortifying except that JeNeale is an editor and the book was about puntuation. I had a brief flash of insight into the feelings of Mormon who, as he abridged the Book of Mormon made his mistakes on golden plates. At least only JeNeale, who loves me anyway, sees my mistakes as opposed to people by the billion all over the world throughout many generations of time. (Feeling a little better now - Phew!)

By now all ten of you who read this are probably on pins and needles wondering, "What did The Friend say?" Well, 69 days after I submitted the article (in other words, today) I got a response to my recent inquiry in which I succintly stated, "The suspense is killing me!" The response? "Did you submit an article? We have no record of any article submitted by a Lauralee Hill." And so I ask you, "Is that a rejection? Does that count? Are they trying to let me down nicely? easily?" I honestly think I would have preferred the reference to insanity.

I'm not looking for a show of support. What I'd really love to see are your ideas of a great rejection. What should the Ensign, the Friend, and Family Fun have said had they been more responsibly brutal? Maybe if they're really good I can count them toward my one hundred.

4 comments:

JeNeale said...

One of the young women in my ward interviewed to be on the yearbook staff next year. She received a letter that said, "You have been rejected as part of the Vallivue yearbook staff." Not a "We regret to inform you," or "Thanks for interviewing," just basically, "we don't want you." I thought that was pretty harsh.

I loved the book, by the way. I had borrowed it from a friend a couple of years ago and started it, but I had to give it back before I finished it. I can't wait to read it. And I only smile when I come across errors that you make because it just makes me miss you.

I found some really cute stuff for her cute little Grace today. Can't wait to show them to you!

Marisa said...

Here's one that I got recently on a manuscript: "This is a minor contribution at best. The theoretic test is crudely done...All in all, a paper that would be marginal in a graduate seminar in a research university."

When I get reviews like these, I usually say a few bad words, then send it somewhere else.

Just so you don't think I'm completely sucky, the other reviews were slightly kinder!

$

Marisa said...

In one of my seminars I had a professor who didn't even finish reading my paper -- basically he said it wouldn't have even merited a check mark in the "reject" box. Yikes.

You should see his review on PickaProf! (only kidding!).

TiffahZzZ said...

Lauralee, you once told me that sometimes you feel like our Heavenly Father spoke to you through a pen. How could he not?! you write beautifully :D Even if publishers don't see it YET, the rest of us do!! I know if writing is really what you want to do, you will do it! Your Amazing!